WARNING: S:AAB is property of Fox. Kopitiam is a local Malaysian sitcom set in a 'kopitiam'- coffeeshop, which is chockful of very local Malaysian humour. A treat to watch!!
There's nothing in here that explains how the 58th appear in the Kopitiam. They are just there, and the Kopitiam gang thinks they are actors. This is very Malaysian humour, and has bits that are integral to every Kopitiam episode. So, if you think we overdo it, wait till you watch the real thing! Incidentally, it's on Monday at 9pm on NTV7. So, watch it and see if we captured the characters as well as we thought we did! ;)
NOTE: No offence against Singaporeans or Malaysians intended. This is simply culture stereotyping taken to the extreme.
And with a round of applause to Garry for putting it all together after the
chat, drumroll please, sit back, relax and enjoy that refreshing cup of
kopi-o coz from the funny-bones of Garry and Spar, we ask you to please....
[Stephen looks at Cooper's hair in despair]
Stephen: [cringe] Aiyoh! You call that a haircut-ah? What did
you use? A rat-ah?
[In the background]
Cooper: Who's Jackie Chan?
[All turn to McQueen]
McQueen: Er... He's not in the World War Two military books...
[Susan makes goo-goo eyes at McQueen]
Kong: [aside to Chan] Eh, Chan. Why is his name Queen, ah? You
don't think... [both men turn and look at McQueen who is trying to avoid
[In the background, a customer signals at Marie, but is ignored]
Customer #1: Excuse me...
[At the Wild Cardsí table]
Wang: [nudges Coop] Don't you thinks she's cute? Ow! [rubs
at ribs, glaring at Phousse, who looks innocently back]
[Phousse looks pleadingly at Vansen]
Vansen: Don't look at me, ask Paul to talk to him.
[Coop jumps up and recites Marine pledge]
Coop: [bewildered] Where did *that* come from??!!
[Meanwhile, the Kopitiam gang applauds]
Kong: Wah! So chim one!
[The rest of the 58th look weirdly at their coffee]
Wang: I *knew* it.
[Marie and Susan jostle West and Wang]
Susan: Let me. [sweet smile]
[In the background]
Chan: Eh, Kong. got Rose Chan show-lah!
[The fight begins to degenerate]
Susan: I'M paying for HALF of it!
[The 58th drag their squadron mate and commanding officer away, taking advantage of the distraction]
Susan: Well, at least we are well-known. He's with them, I'm sure he's
[They turn to Wang, who freezes, holding on to Coopís arm]
Both girls: So, you're Malaysian/Singaporean, right?
[The girls glare at each other]
Wang: [deer-in-the-car-headlights look] Umm... err... actually, I'm Filipino-American.
[Both girls look disgusted]
Susan: See? I told you he's not Malaysian!
[Meanwhile, Vansen desperately tries to calm down the disoriented Coop and McQueen]
Vansen: [picking shards of a former guitar off her flightsuit]
Sir? Coop? Dammit, listen to me! [hisses to Phousse] YOU try!
[Phousse and Vansen glare at him]
Wang: On second thoughts...
[McQueen's wary eyes search the kopitiam. Suddenly, he catches sight of his cup of coffee. He dodges Vansen, brushes past West and lunges for the coffee]
[Fortunately, Marie and Susan get in McQueen's way and Vansen dives for the table]
McQueen: [does flickering eyeball thing] What do you think, we're back on the block smokin' and jokin'? Hear this loud and clear, Marine -- I am not your 'guy'. I'm not your Joe, I'm not your damn drinking buddy... [to Susan and Marie] and I sure as hell am not a mark in a singles bar. You hear this CFB -- I am not here to make friends! When this war ends, and [to Damphousse] you go back to raise money for charity, and [to Wang] you're eating dogs at Wrigley, and [to West] you go back to Mayberry, I'm still going to be out here waiting for the next one. That's why I'm here. That's what I'm good for.
[The 58th cringe, having heard all this before. Vansen catches the coffee and quickly dumps it into the potted plant. The unlucky plant withers and shrivels up]
Joe: [blur look] Eh, of course his name is not Joe, lah. I'M
THE END© Copyrighted 1998
Compiled and edited by Garuda and Sparhawk
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